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16 January 2009 @ 11:48 am
    Ha-ha yea I know that the subject may be lame, but I gotta write out my feelings or I'm gonna go crazy in this world. I made this journal so that I could have an outlet for my stress and anger! And it seems that even when I do write I cant find the words to explain absolutely everything I wanna get out. I mean don't get me wrong, I would love to tell you all the wonderful things going on in my life, but somehow all the bad just wants to come out, and I just give up. But I gotta start somewhere... Right? But I am so scared of how I would make others feel because I know how I feel deep down inside... Maybe I'm just rambling on about nonsense to you, but my life is complicated. I know yours is too. I'm tryna cope with everything that I go through. Like for instance, my father thinking that I am sleeping with my basketball coach! Just because shes a lesbian, and I'm bi! Like what type of sense does that make?! She's a role model to me, nothing more and nothing less! I listen to her advice YEA! But who doesn't listen to their role model! Does that count as sleeping with her?! Can you do the math?
    I have nothing else to say anymore lol! I'm trying to find some words but I can't! Its difficult ha-ha!

Current Location: School
Current Mood: frustratedAnnoyed
Current Music: None
         The soul mate is what we aspire to and like to understand about us, is what we deem to be perfection, purity and endless regarding our own being.

"When you are in Love you can't fall asleep because reality is better than your dreams."

If you love someone you would be willing to give up everything for them, but if they loved you back theyd never ask you to. 

 We are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love.
Current Location: school, as usual lol
Current Mood: lovedadored
06 November 2008 @ 01:04 pm

Sometimes this image of a perfect us never seems to add up....

somedays u want me

somedays you ignore me

other days ur just inbetween

I feel like DAMN....  Why am I even DEALING with you at all

but then i realize that your love has gotten tangled up in to my mind

and the way your body feels against mine ahs got me in a trance that I cant sem to get out of

Im like why you got me like this Mario

and you arent even there to even answer me back

so again Im like DAMN here I go again

with the same ol' bullshit that I just left you for

and here I am crawlin back on me knees sayin yea I want chu too.....

I still havent seen you since then

and im beginning to wonder if your lost in the cross fire of using me

and actually LOVIN ME....

So how am I really suppose to feel when Im rolled up in to my bed

and your not there....

when I need your arms wrapped around me, and I just feel the blanket of nelgect

and just the rain against my window pain

Yea Mary J Blidge was right...

I am going down

because of the silence that is around my room

and the deafening sound of my crying is puttin me to sleep at night

instead of the love makin I crave so much from you in these last 3 months

I should call it quits by now, but I cant

and it seems like I dont want to

just like a crack head, haha, I cant live witout chu

but I gotta give up everyone I love for you....
Current Location: School
Current Mood: lonelylonely
Current Music: Rehab
06 November 2008 @ 12:52 pm
    Last night, a great man won the election for the presidency of the United States. And he deserved that win. I feel that he is going to make a change in this nation, and he is right! We all need to come together as one people because he cannot do it by himself. A nation divided is not strong, and  will crumble like it already is if we keep going down the path that we are going down. He said that "The road will be long. Our climb will be steep. We may not get there in one year or even one term, but America-- I have never been more hoepful than I am tonight that we will get there. I promise you-- we as people will get there" and dammit-- we will. I believe in our new president that he will make a change not matter what the circumstances are, he will get us through the rough patches.

    We have a wonderful leader who is going to make that difference for us, maybe even help us more than any president has. This is the campaign that should go down in history. This IS a defining moment, that we shall never regret in our LIFETIME!!!! Imagine if Martin Luther King was alive, he would well up with tears of joy in his eyes, and a smile on his heart and say "god... we finally made it".... This election changes everything.
05 November 2008 @ 09:27 am


30 October 2008 @ 01:45 pm
I dont understand how some females (especially at my school) can have the nerve to place judgement on females who iengage in sexual activities when they have never even TRIED to have sex. It really has got me trippin out on whether or not they fully understand what we go through.... Sometimes people have accidents and they learn from them, we dont just lay on our backs and try and get pregnant... I know I didnt.... You've never felt how sex can sometimes overpower someones mind, some people are mentally unstable when it comes to sex, and will do anything to get it.... Some just want the feelin of bbeing wanted so they may engage in sex.... I know that I did it because I love casual sex, not because I PLANNED on gettin pregnant.

If I were able to vote, I would say NO on prop 4 because I feel as though we shouldnt have to worry our parents about every mistake we make. Its our life, and we practically do what we want with our bodies and minds... So why cant we have a say on whether or not our parents need to know we are carrying a child.... I mean our lives are already chaotic as it is, we dont need any more stressed placed onto is.

I dont care if you agree with me or not, I just express my feelings, which is irritated if you wanted to know, on certain, and this is one issue I wanted to get off my chest...
You shouldnt judge something you have NEVER experienced in you life... Until it has happened to you then dont say shyt about it thank you!
Current Mood: aggravatedPISSED
Current Music: Happily Never After by the Pussycat Dolls